hi. my name is mackenzie and i never meet a stranger.

i come to the same starbucks in virginia beach every week. i get my iced coffee, catch up on some online reading, plan some younglife stuff then go on my way. one morning i was having an off day. my hair was looking as ratchet as can be. i was stressed out. i couldn't focus when i was reading abide in christ. the struggle was far too real that day. but then god threw a little nugget of awesomeness my way.

this older lady i had seen in starbucks a few times walked up to my table. she looked at me and said, "hi. forgive me if this is weird but you are absolutely beautiful and the friendliest girl. you always smile and say hi to me and my sister. it always makes our day. i just wanted to tell you that." then she went, got her drink and sat down. when i left i said bye then got in my car to call my mom and tell her what happened. i couldn't even get through the conversation without crying. i was just overwhelmed by how nice the lady was to me without knowing a single thing about me. it made my day. little did i know it would spark a friendship that has blessed my heart in so many ways.

it has been a few months since our first encounter. since then we have spent hours upon hours sharing bits and pieces of our lives with each other. her name is ilene. she is a wife, sister, cancer survivor, cat enthusiast and friend. i have learned so much through our conversations. we have laughed together. we have cried together. it's safe to say we have challenged each other to look at things from another perspective. i always get excited when i walk in and see her sitting there with her sister and/or friends laughing, painting and doing life together. and somehow i got thrown into their little community. it's safe to say i'm the youngest by at least 30 years but i love it. it's weird. i have such a child like heart but an old soul that goes right along with it. getting to know these people has really blessed my soul.

today, before everyone got here, i was sitting in a chair spending some time with jesus. ilene walked in and sat down next to me. she smiled and started doing her own thing. i took out my headphones then started talking with her. wow. she opened up a lot about how she viewed jesus and god at one point in her life. i loved how open and real she was expressing that with me. then she shared with me how that view changed when she realized the other sides of god. he wasn't a god who just condemned. he loved with this love she could not understand. i looked at her eyes when she was sharing about how much god loves her. i could tell how sincere she was being. i could hear it in her voice. it was a beautiful thing to hear how god, through lots of pursuing, redeemed her view on him. just thinking about it gets me emotional all over again.

then it was like it was my turn. i got to share a lot about how god redeemed my view and belief on his love for me my junior year of college. i talked about how it took me being vulnerable with a group of ladies who came around me and helped me work through some things. i told her how it took me realizing it's okay to not have it all together - to have courage in owning my imperfection and realize that's exactly how jesus wanted me. i told her how it took a screaming match with god to realize just how loved i am by him and that my identity is hidden in him. i am not mackenzie. i am his. i am daughter. how beautiful it was to be reminded of that and share that with her. she looked at me with tears in her eyes and simply replied, "thank you for being real. i've never seen a more beautiful picture of the love of christ in someones life." we hugged then started doing our separate things.

i was not expecting to be an emotional train wreck today. god had other plans. and i'm okay with that. i'm thankful for those silly emotions he has blessed me with. i'm thankful for the story he has given me because it's something i can share with others. my story is not to brag about how awesome my life is but to show people how much god loves me by how he has redeemed and is continuing to redeem my story.

my heart is full. thank you jesus.

"...emotional and more raw and more honest than even anything we did on Barton Hollow." - Joy Williams

i could not agree more. 

the civil wars won me over with their lyrics and sound when i heard their in studio performance on live 100.5. they sang poison & wine and falling. i took the long way home that night just so i could hear them sing and cry. it was simple. it was beautiful. that night i started all my research on them but couldn't find much. long story short their first album came out and i had it on repeat for weeks. then a few of us went to see them live for my 22nd birthday. yep, emotional roller coaster. they know how to suck you in and keep you on that emotional roller coaster the entire show. we met them after. what lovely people. after that i could not wait for their second album. fast forward to finding out they were taking a break. NOOOOO. i was so upset because their music is delightful. then there was a light at the end of the tunnel - a new album to drop late in the summer and a new single. i posted about the one that got away. i loved it. then they started sharing other songs from the album. perfect. 

last saturday i streamed the entire album via itunes and wrote down some random thoughts i had as i listened. a few of the things i said were things joy said about the album. i remember listening to the lyrics and thinking to myself, "these are intense, personal, heart wrenching lyrics. they are being way more vulnerable and raw this album. brilliant." the next thing that stood out was the fact it's definitely more produced than the first album but in a tasteful way. some artists will do an album and not venture out from what the sounded like because people really enjoyed the first album. some artists do and it's a train wreck. the civil wars successfully ventured away from the simple sounds on barton hollow on some of their new tracks. and it's amazing. 

my favorite track? so far it's track 3 - same old same old. it's that harmony and simple strumming of the guitar that sucked me in a couple of years ago. and the lyrics. oh my word. i can't even handle them. they're so raw and real. beautiful. it's just all around a beautiful song.

with that, my friends, i highly recommend purchasing the civil wars self titled album.