i go through certain times in my life where a particular word is evident in different conversations, reading and prayer. a lot of the times it's more like two or three words. recently i've been hit with identity and daily. there are a few other words but i feel like these are the biggest ones for me.

identity.
i've been blessed a lot by listening to people share their stories. i love listening to stories. it's great to listen to people be real and share what their lives looked like before god started redeeming particular moments and where he has them now. those stories always bring it back to the here and now. recently the things i hear all point back to figuring out how to embrace and live out being a son or daughter. it all points back to identity.

every single time i turn on facebook there is a new article about potential relationships and relationships. if you are a woman who has 5 characteristics a great man will want you. here are 8 ways christians should date. these are things i've learned about being married. and then there are so many more articles about love. it's cool. there are great points in each of them. heck, i've shared them because some of those things are great to have in friendships. however, they all neglect one big topic - identity.

i just thought bringing up the topic and sharing my thoughts on it would be a good thing. (side note - i do not have it all together. this is something i need to learn again. i'm a ragamuffin just trying to figure out how to live like the redeemed daughter i am in christ.) here are some things that come to mind when i think and study identity.

there is one place we have our identity secured and that's in jesus. when god looks at us, his children, he doesn't see our mistakes and our shortcomings. when god looks at us he sees jesus. he sees what jesus accomplished on the cross. we have been granted freedom to approach the throne of our father just as we are because of jesus. there's nothing we can do for him to love us more or less. there's nothing we can do for him to forgive us any more or less. we are loved and forgiven. and with that comes freedom in being a sons and daughters of god. i think we get that but don't embrace it.

living in freedom as sons and daughters can be easy some days and difficult other days. why? for me satan likes to attack my thoughts. he brings up things i've been forgiven of and likes to remind me of my mistakes. as much as i hate to admit it - sometimes i let that define me. i let that forgiven sin, that shortcoming, that mistake define me instead of letting that freedom as a daughter define me. i'm sure i'm not the only one who feels that way. it's a constant struggle of deciding whether we are going to believe the lies satan throws our way or embrace the truth and freedom that comes in god's forgiveness. are we going to let false identity define us or embrace our true identity in christ?

the one relationship that defines us is our relationship with god. it's not in our relationship status on facebook. it's not in our friendships. it's not in the relationships we have in our families. we are created in god's perfect image but we are a bunch of ragamuffins. i don't know about you but i find a whole lot of relief in knowing the one relationship that should define me comes from someone who is perfect and good. sometimes it's easy to doubt that when we are constantly seeing things on relationships though. overall, i feel like the things i read are performance based and neglect identity. the thoughts, "oh, so these are the 5 things guys are looking for in a woman? i only meet 3 of the 5 so clearly there's something wrong with me. it's time to make changes." uhm, stop it. so god created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. own it. we are who we are because that's how god created us. we bear his perfect image! embrace it. own it. let the things we have been freely given as sons and daughters define us! who cares what people think? we aren't made for them. we have been created to bring god glory!

i feel like i have a lot more i could say on the topic on allowing relationships or the lack thereof define us. david platt articulates everything i am trying/wanting to say oh so beautifully - The Christian’s ultimate identity is in Christ. In Christ we are fully complete :: there is satisfaction and sufficiency that far supersedes anything any woman and man could bring to the table.

here's my heart on how to own being sons and daughters- i hope that we all see how important our relationship with abba father is and how important it is to abide with him. it might seem like a daunting task but it starts with us trusting him to keep us abiding. once we start doing life with him it becomes more clear who we are as sons and daughters. it doesn't become easier but we're walking with someone who conquered death and is faithful. may we be reminded of that daily. he knows our hearts desires and will bless them the way he sees fit. trust and obey. for me that starts with daily abiding with him as his daughter.

finally! a day of rest on what has got to be one of the most beautiful fall mornings.

i'm sitting outside of starbucks with my iced coffee enjoying the warm sun, a nice little breeze and seryn. seryn is a band i've been listening to for a year or two. i'm forever grateful to malcolm for introducing such sweet jams into my life. i had them on repeat all of the time then i started discovering other music. long story short they got put on the back burner...until today. i could not think of more perfect music to have in the background.

the music is simple but blows my mind at the same time. their harmonies give me chills. the music itself is absolutely beautiful. i'm a sucker for musicians who use all different types of instruments. boom. that's what they do. the lyrics stop and make me think. basically seryn is just a solid group of musicians who make really good music.

we will all be changed is a personal favorite. if you have time you should listen to the album. in studio they sound amazing. this video is a live version of the song. they sound phenomenal. hope you enjoy the simple and refreshing sounds of seryn.

the head and the heart released a new album earlier this week. i plan on writing up something about the new album in a week or so. i will tell ya - it's amazing. go buy it immediately if you don't own it. you can thank me later. the title track has been the one song to really stick out to me. i think it's because my life has been beyond insane the past couple of weeks. i feel like i haven't been able to stop and catch my breath. this song is a very chill song and repeats over and over again just for a moment let's be still. let's be still. i'm realizing how crucial that is in everyday life - to take a moment to be still before the lord. i know that's not the direction these guys were going in with this song but that's what has been standing out to me this week. so go check it out. it's awesome.


the head and the heart - let's be still video

i have been asked/volunteered to write a letter to a precious little girl for her to read on her 18th birthday. i thought 18 would be a good year to pick because it's kind of a big year in life. also, looking back at 18, there are so many things i wish somebody would have told me. i feel like it would have helped me out in a big way. however, experience is often the best teacher even if it hurts walking through some of those things.

i've been brainstorming so many different things. (side note - looking back at 18 i'm just overwhelmed with gratitude for the lord and his provision in my life.) here are some of the things i want to share with this girl. praying we all can find a little something out of it to encourage us...no matter how old we are.

1. YOU ARE LOVED. repeat it over and over again. you are loved. you are known. you have value. you are daughter. (or son...for all the guys reading this!) and it has nothing to do with what you bring to the table. it's all because of jesus. take a second to let that sink it. your value, beauty, identity - it's hidden in him. embrace your identity in him as you go off into this next phase of life. don't let anyone tell you something different. there are going to be times when you doubt this. we are girls. it's bound to happen because our culture sucks. when those times happen just turn on some beyonce and have a dance party by yourself. (trust me. it works. you will feel empowered!) then, and i would say this is the most important thing, go spend some time with the man who created you in his perfect image. a great place to start? psalm 139. specifically verses 13 and 14. for you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. i praise you because i am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, i know that full well. you are a child of god. repeat that to yourself daily. you are a child of god.

2. keep your life organized. seriously. buy a super cool planner and write stuff down. then when you're done mark it off your list. your life will instantly be less stressful when you have a little bit of organization.

3. surround yourself with a nurturing community. growth happens in the context of community. i know this to be true in my life. also, it's something jesus did while he was on earth. i'd say it's pretty important to do. this is where you're going to find people who love you well. you'll learn to be vulnerable within that community. and it doesn't have to be with 40 different people. no, no no! it will be with a few girls. y'all will challenge each other, encourage each other and grow together as individuals and as friends. these are the friends that will stick around for a long long time. life isn't meant to be done alone. so i pray you find a solid community...especially in college! the things you learn will be with you always. it's a beautiful thing.

...and i'm going to stop there. i'm distracted by two precious little boys at starbucks. there will be a part two soon.

hi. my name is mackenzie and i never meet a stranger.

i come to the same starbucks in virginia beach every week. i get my iced coffee, catch up on some online reading, plan some younglife stuff then go on my way. one morning i was having an off day. my hair was looking as ratchet as can be. i was stressed out. i couldn't focus when i was reading abide in christ. the struggle was far too real that day. but then god threw a little nugget of awesomeness my way.

this older lady i had seen in starbucks a few times walked up to my table. she looked at me and said, "hi. forgive me if this is weird but you are absolutely beautiful and the friendliest girl. you always smile and say hi to me and my sister. it always makes our day. i just wanted to tell you that." then she went, got her drink and sat down. when i left i said bye then got in my car to call my mom and tell her what happened. i couldn't even get through the conversation without crying. i was just overwhelmed by how nice the lady was to me without knowing a single thing about me. it made my day. little did i know it would spark a friendship that has blessed my heart in so many ways.

it has been a few months since our first encounter. since then we have spent hours upon hours sharing bits and pieces of our lives with each other. her name is ilene. she is a wife, sister, cancer survivor, cat enthusiast and friend. i have learned so much through our conversations. we have laughed together. we have cried together. it's safe to say we have challenged each other to look at things from another perspective. i always get excited when i walk in and see her sitting there with her sister and/or friends laughing, painting and doing life together. and somehow i got thrown into their little community. it's safe to say i'm the youngest by at least 30 years but i love it. it's weird. i have such a child like heart but an old soul that goes right along with it. getting to know these people has really blessed my soul.

today, before everyone got here, i was sitting in a chair spending some time with jesus. ilene walked in and sat down next to me. she smiled and started doing her own thing. i took out my headphones then started talking with her. wow. she opened up a lot about how she viewed jesus and god at one point in her life. i loved how open and real she was expressing that with me. then she shared with me how that view changed when she realized the other sides of god. he wasn't a god who just condemned. he loved with this love she could not understand. i looked at her eyes when she was sharing about how much god loves her. i could tell how sincere she was being. i could hear it in her voice. it was a beautiful thing to hear how god, through lots of pursuing, redeemed her view on him. just thinking about it gets me emotional all over again.

then it was like it was my turn. i got to share a lot about how god redeemed my view and belief on his love for me my junior year of college. i talked about how it took me being vulnerable with a group of ladies who came around me and helped me work through some things. i told her how it took me realizing it's okay to not have it all together - to have courage in owning my imperfection and realize that's exactly how jesus wanted me. i told her how it took a screaming match with god to realize just how loved i am by him and that my identity is hidden in him. i am not mackenzie. i am his. i am daughter. how beautiful it was to be reminded of that and share that with her. she looked at me with tears in her eyes and simply replied, "thank you for being real. i've never seen a more beautiful picture of the love of christ in someones life." we hugged then started doing our separate things.

i was not expecting to be an emotional train wreck today. god had other plans. and i'm okay with that. i'm thankful for those silly emotions he has blessed me with. i'm thankful for the story he has given me because it's something i can share with others. my story is not to brag about how awesome my life is but to show people how much god loves me by how he has redeemed and is continuing to redeem my story.

my heart is full. thank you jesus.

"...emotional and more raw and more honest than even anything we did on Barton Hollow." - Joy Williams

i could not agree more. 

the civil wars won me over with their lyrics and sound when i heard their in studio performance on live 100.5. they sang poison & wine and falling. i took the long way home that night just so i could hear them sing and cry. it was simple. it was beautiful. that night i started all my research on them but couldn't find much. long story short their first album came out and i had it on repeat for weeks. then a few of us went to see them live for my 22nd birthday. yep, emotional roller coaster. they know how to suck you in and keep you on that emotional roller coaster the entire show. we met them after. what lovely people. after that i could not wait for their second album. fast forward to finding out they were taking a break. NOOOOO. i was so upset because their music is delightful. then there was a light at the end of the tunnel - a new album to drop late in the summer and a new single. i posted about the one that got away. i loved it. then they started sharing other songs from the album. perfect. 

last saturday i streamed the entire album via itunes and wrote down some random thoughts i had as i listened. a few of the things i said were things joy said about the album. i remember listening to the lyrics and thinking to myself, "these are intense, personal, heart wrenching lyrics. they are being way more vulnerable and raw this album. brilliant." the next thing that stood out was the fact it's definitely more produced than the first album but in a tasteful way. some artists will do an album and not venture out from what the sounded like because people really enjoyed the first album. some artists do and it's a train wreck. the civil wars successfully ventured away from the simple sounds on barton hollow on some of their new tracks. and it's amazing. 

my favorite track? so far it's track 3 - same old same old. it's that harmony and simple strumming of the guitar that sucked me in a couple of years ago. and the lyrics. oh my word. i can't even handle them. they're so raw and real. beautiful. it's just all around a beautiful song.

with that, my friends, i highly recommend purchasing the civil wars self titled album. 

this is going to be short and sweet. beautiful by ben rector is the free single of the week on itunes! you need to go and download this! he played this song when i saw him back in the spring. i loved it then and i love it now! he's a great musician who likes to have a good time at his shows. you can tell that in his music and by how he plays. overall he's a really down to earth guy who really loves what he's doing and is thankful for his fans. so go discover him. it's free! plus you'll enjoy his music or so i hope.


side note - if you ever see him live don't tell him you love him or else he might mention how awkward that makes him feel at a random show.